i am me.

i vividly remember being in high school & hating it. i also vividly remember having that feeling of trying to look that certain way to be accepted - i even had an eyeshadow collection that would make tammy fae jealous..  everything had to look perfect and even then it wasnt enough.  trying to be with the in crowd, only to find yourself as one of the smart kids. one of the kids who had their yearbook signed saying something like "expect to see you in national geographic one day.."  is that a compliment even? i still wonder about that.

and then we grow up. well most of us do. we start living more like our mothers & fathers had taught us - "beauty is from within.." "you must love yourself for who you are before anyone else can." back then it seemed ridiculous and stupid. and we could never quite understand why they babbled so much.  now i realize why they said the things they said. we can gob on ten pounds of eyeshadow and the darkest bronzer, but we still are the same person inside.

my makeup routine since the formative years has become quite simple. enough to embrace the freckles i hated so much in grade school. the brilliant blue eyes that people are convinced are just colored contacts. the fair porcelain skin that i used to get upset about because i couldnt tan like the other girls. & most of all the rosy red cheeks that come about just from alittle stress.

i am me.